Why Write?

At one point, I decided I wanted to return to blogging because I missed writing regularly. I haven’t really done it for a while, partially due to the distractions of everyday life, and partially because I didn’t really have much I wanted to write about. I didn’t really know why the passion to write had left me, but I found it much easier to go watch TV or play a game than to sit down and try to make something with words.

I started blogging originally with the idea that I would do something for friends and family to read that would interest them and give me an outlet for what I had to say. In the end, I found I had this mild discomfort with the whole thing, because I kept having to think about what I wanted to write. I mean, the world was reading it, and despite the fact that the world might not know exactly who I am, they were getting a deeper look into who I was. I was very careful about what I wrote. I mostly linked. And the whole blogging thing became kind of boring for me, as well as the world.

Not too long ago, I moved from a position at work where I was mostly allowed to be introverted, to a training position where I had to be more extroverted. At first, I was nothing but uncomfortable. Mostly before, I was allowed to do my thing, and people would thank me for it. It kind of reminds me from the scene from “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” where Arthur saves everyone from certain doom, and Zaphod tells him so, to which Arthur replies, “Oh, it was nothing.” And Zaphod shoots back, “Oh, was it then? Well forget it.” But I actually liked fading back into the woodwork after that.

There’s been this slow transition since then, where I’ve been more in the spotlight, and I realize I don’t mind attention so much. When I was a kid, I loved attention. My mom was a singer who worked with a few polish bands on and off, and she would often drag me up on stage with her to sing, and I ate up the attention from that.

But what does this have to do with writing? Well, when I finished college, I tried to write. Heck, I had a degree in it, right? But that lack of interest crept in. And it took me this long to realize that it was because I didn’t have an audience. I mean, no one was reading what I was writing. I didn’t really send it out, because I didn’t think anyone wanted to read it. And I think I was also afraid, as all artists are, that I sucked.

So, now, in an effort to find that mojo that writing is, I’m going to be brave and post some things out here. Feel free to enjoy them, hate them, comment on them, so I can understand what you don’t like.

I’ll start at the beginning, kind of. A silly poem I wrote when I was in fourth grade, for what is the Internet for if not self-publishing your own fourth-grade drivel? ;P This actually won first prize in the “Court of the Mystical Rose” poetry contest that year. I owe special thanks to my dad, too, since well after my bedtime on the night before this was due I was sitting there crying and struggling to finish it. He stepped in and helped me and we got the darn thing done. Everyone needs someone to help them meet their deadlines in life.

Anyway here goes…

New Horizons

Hope for tomorrow, bright and true,
‘Cause into your life will come something new,
Sometimes we’re sad and sometimes we’re blue,
So let’s hope tomorrow will be better for you.

If you missed your chance today,
Prepare for it another day,
Tomorrow will be better, true,
Your future dreams depend on you.

Too Lazy For Web Design, Not Too Lazy For Exercise

I’ve really been wanting to get back to blog posting, but I’ve been spending too many weekends doing everything BUT updating the template on this site. I actually did some work on it a while ago, but I haven’t gotten around to putting the design work I did together with the code in WordPress that makes the site run.

So….I downloaded a template, just so I could get away from the default look, and also so I could take a look under the hood and see how the templates were designed, which might make the rest of my design work go quicker. This one is called Cutline 3-Column Split 1.1 by Chris Pearson.

It’s a nice three-column design, which is something I was going for.

Eventually, I will get around to building my own. I could use the holidays as an excuse, but really they’ve been pretty stress free since Natasha and I did our shopping online mostly, and we haven’t had a lot of people to buy for.

What *has* been taking up my time is exercise. Ever since my last trip to the doctor, I’ve been a bit concerned about my weight and a number of bothersome little things that have come along with getting older. I really felt, as the Barenaked Ladies song “Too Little, Too Late” puts it, that I was “gaining pounds, at the precipice of too late”. I made a commitment after that doctor visit that I was going to improve myself, and I was going to start by exercising every day possible and changing my diet so I would lose some weight.

So, seven weeks or so later, I’m pretty happy that I have managed to lose 12 pounds. That’s pretty significant, since I don’t think I have ever managed to do that before in my entire life. Well, except for when I was a kid and I took up biking so I could bike over to this park where this girl I liked hung out. ;P That was when I lost my “baby fat”, which wasn’t actually “baby” fat at all, but was really more “Twinkie and cheese sandwich with extra-mayo” fat.

Keith With Baby Fat Keith Without Baby Fat
Keith With Baby Fat Keith Without Baby Fat

It does take up a lot of time though, which has left me less time for other things. I haven’t played “World of Warcraft” in over a month, and I’m really not missing it.

I’ve also taken up a bunch of hobbies — just things I wanted to do that I never got around to. Like playing the guitar. And painting, just because I wanted to try it. I don’t think I really expect to be very good at any of these things. They say it takes ten years to sort of master the basic skills in anything. But they were things I always thought, “I should do that.” I’m happy to say I’m actually sticking with them, instead of giving up in frustration as soon as I stumble. I tended to do that as a kid, which is why I never learned the accordion.

But now, I have a site template I can work with, and more energy from working out, so expect to see more posts here.

So what kinds of things are you doing to improve yourself? Got any good tips for learning the guitar? (Barre chords are killing me!) Are they really all “happy little trees” when you paint them? Drop me a comment and let me know.